Why Men Hate Going to Church

Why Men Hate Going to Church


This is the latest offering from Thomas Nelson publishing. It is an attempt to redress the gender imbalance that we now find in the western church and as Murrow correctly states is only going to get worse as church culture is increasingly feminised.

The question I had was is this just a more Christian version of ‘Men are from Mars and Women from Venus’ where the differences between men and women are highlighted without ever being criticised or encouraged to change?

I think to a certain degree it is. Murrow does highlight a lot of problems and he does explain the differences well – and where the problem is with the structure of the church then his highlighting is helpful as we consider what church needs to do to become more accommodating.

But, some of the problem is that men are sinners and need to change. Yeah, they might not be into chatting and empathy and listening but then if that is what relationship with God and others involves then just trotting out the excuse of ‘I’m a man’ doesn’t cut it!

In summary – helpful book for those who look after churches and put services together, but not all the answers are within these pages.

Surprised By Oxford. Beautiful.

Surprised By Oxford. Beautiful.

Surprised by Oxford is a beautiful book. I mean, literally it has a beautiful cover. For some reason Christian publishers usually delight in producing the worst covers for books and despite the saying – everyone does judge a book by its cover. This one though is beautiful – matt finish, lovely font, great photo of an oxford college.

Then you turn the first page and thankfully, the beauty does not stop there. Chapters titled with John Donne and Byron and Lewis quotes add a cultural depth to the book that uncultural chaps like me find very appealing. Carolyn Weber then tells the story of how she fell in love. Fell in love with Oxford and the magic of its streets and squares and colleges. How she fell in love with TDH (tall, dark and handsome) but ultimately how she discovered the love of God in all its complexity and wonder. Punctuated with stories of her childhood and the romantics that she loves this really is a great book. It’s a great apologetic without really meaning to. It shows the truth and satisfaction that being a Christian brings. I loved it and would recommend everyone read it.

Real Marriage

I cannot remember a Christian book that has come out with so much hype about it pre release and then so many blog posts written about it afterwards and so much discussion for and against it. Driscoll certainly does divide opinion particularly in Britain. I think it is acknowledged that he does have things that we need to listen to but often goes about saying it in unhelpful ways! Just to be clear I am not wishing to add to that discussion, I write merely so I can read the book and write a review about it for Thomas Nelson. The claim is that ‘Real Marriage: The truth about sex, friendship and life together by Mark and Grace Driscoll is a no holes barred, reveal all, talk about anything and everything book on marriage. I think that largely it is helpful, as an Englishman some of it feels self congratulatory and over the top but I do appreciate the Driscoll’s candidness and honesty whilst also seeking to take and teach the Bible seriously.

I think particularly their call for Christian men to step up and be godly men is of great value and that we must reject the pornified culture that is now so prevalent within our society. It is a book that I would recommend to Christians, but to read it with care and that other books written on marriage out there may be more helpful.

The Boy that Changed the World

This is a children's book from Thomas Nelson publishing that I was asked to review. I did not have to post a favourable review.

This is a really lovely book that I read with my nephew. The art work is really nicely done and the pictures are big and bright with lots of detail within them that you can spend lots of time looking at.

The message of the book is also quite nice. It is slightly moralistic saying that if we try hard and do small things well then this will eventually change the world. But any message that encourages young people to look beyond themselves and seek to make the world a better place can only be a good thing.

Next Generation's How Should a Christian Live?

This is another offering from Thomas Nelson and I must say has been the best thing that I have reviewed from them recently. The publishing company is broad and there are varied things that can be purchased from them but any book whose objective is to present the Bible and the message of the gospel to young people and teenagers in relevant and exciting ways has to be a good thing. This resource with the bible readings on mp3 that can be listened to and then games that go along with it to enforce the message ensure that it is a good way of communicating old truths in new ways. The design of the book, even down to the font and colours used are really aimed at the audience and really suit the youth culture and things that young people are exposed to.

The reading of the bible is front and centre throughout the book and the truth of the gospel is clear to see and is explained in a way that can be easily understood.

To a Brits ears it does come across slightly cheesy every now and again but that is a very small price to pay.

There are only 12 sessions within it so it is quite short but for the price of around £12 on amazon I would really recommend this to parents or youth workers who want to encourage their children to get to grips more and more with the great truths found within the Bible.

Made to suffer

This article has been linked to all over the web recently, but on reading it I really wanted to highlight this part for myself. Ajith's final point is that we must have a strong theology of suffering in the West, something that currently is sadly lacking.

Several people have sympathized with me, saying it must be hard and frustrating to serve in a country wracked by war and hostile to evangelism. Indeed, we have suffered. A few months ago, one of our staff workers was brutally assaulted and killed. But I think the biggest pain I have experienced is the pain I have received from Youth for Christ, the organization for which I have worked for 34 years. I can also say that next to Jesus and my family, Youth for Christ has been the greatest source of joy in my life. Whether you live in the East or the West, you will suffer pain if you are committed to people. This is suffering that can be avoided. We can avoid pain by stopping the relationship or moving on to something more "fulfilling." But what do we lose?

Some years ago I was preparing a message on commitment while traveling in the West. Within the space of a few days, three people told me how they or someone close to them had left a group or a person because of problems. One had left an unhappy marriage; another, a church; another, an organization. Each person described his leaving as a merciful release from suffering. But I could not help asking myself whether, in each of these cases, the Christian thing to do would have been to stay and suffer.

The whole article is here.

We may be born to die, but we were created to live.

This is a recent blog post written by the wife of Michael Spencer, an American blogger/writer/preacher who died earlier this year. In it she explores how the death of her husband was not good, it was not peaceful and ultimately it was not supposed to happen. Her belief in the good news of Jesus' death and resurrection obviously give context and comfort to her grief, but they do not take it away, life was not supposed to be like this, death was not the original plan. When Jesus faces the death of his friend in John 11 he knows that in a few moments he will raise his friend back to life and yet, he still weeps. He is still affected by grief because he sees first hand what sin has done to the world he made and loves.

I'd encourage you to read the whole article here.

Viktor Frankl: Why to believe in others | Video on TED.com

Have a watch of the psychologist Viktor Frankl then consider what the Bible has been saying for a few thousand years......

Viktor Frankl: Why to believe in others | Video on TED.com

When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, and the son of man that you care for him? Yet you have made him a little lower than the heavenly beings and crowned him with glory and honor. You have given him dominion over the works of your hands; you have put all things under his feet, all sheep and oxen, and also the beasts of the field, the birds of the heavens, and the fish of the sea, whatever passes along the paths of the seas. (Psalm 8:3-8 ESV)

Only when we see man as made in the likeness of a personal, creator God do we stand any chance of discovering a true identity and purpose in the world. This really is the first step in a discovery of meaning.

Twitter and BBC Radio Sheffield

So, the BBC called the church office this morning and asked if someone could be interviewed regarding the use of twitter and free speech in our society, naturally they chose me (actually, everyone else was busy!).

It all came off the back of the announcement that Paul Chambers, the gentleman who in February over twitter threatened to blow up Doncaster airport due to delays was charged £1000 for terrorist threats. The tweet was of course meant in jest but the authorities did not see the funny side and have prosecuted him accordingly. This threw up a whole host of discussion around the area of free speech, about thought crime and actual actions and about the use of irony and sarcasm in social media.

Over the phone an hour or so before the 'interview' they told me there would be a Professor of language there from Sheffield University and a discussion would take place around these various themes. So, I desperately read up on free thought and opinion in a pluralistic society, how the Christian faith can engage in these issues and what it has to say about the power of words. Which is very interesting and there are many things that could be said. The interview itself was rather different and instead they just asked me why we used twitter in the first place and what the benefits were for our church. It was brief but quite fun!

Anyway you can listen to it here on iplayer, skip forward to about 2 hours 11 mins for my bit!

Incredible deal from Challies.com

The prolific blogger Tim Challies has set up a 'friends of the blog' site where for about 20 quid you basically get shed loads of free stuff! 4 books, 4 albums and other vouchers, it's well worth the investment!

Click the link and it will take you there, I also get $5 of book vouchers if you do!

Become a Friend of a Friend

Sri Lankan perspective on Health Care reform.

This is a really interesting article written by a Sri Lankan pastor on the state of healthcare in his country and his perception of the Reform in the States. Wherever you stand on the issue it is well worth a read. Click here.

Good Friday

Alas! and did my Savior bleed,   

and did my Sovereign die!  

Would he devote that sacred head   

for sinners such as I?   

Was it for crimes that I have done,   

he groaned upon the tree?   

Amazing pity! Grace unknown!   

And love beyond degree!   

Well might the sun in darkness hide,  

 and shut its glories in,  

 when God, the mighty maker, died   

for his own creature's sin.   

Thus might I hide my blushing face   

while his dear cross appears;   

dissolve my heart in thankfulness,   

and melt mine eyes to tears.   

But drops of tears can ne'er repay  

 the debt of love I owe.   

Here, Lord, I give myself away;   

'tis all that I can do

Son of Hamas

I have just added this book to my amazon wish list. There is an interview with the author here in GQ magazine.

Testimony from Haiti

I read this over at Mars Hill church blog the other day. Read the full script here.

We kill each other, we hate each other, not because of where we come from, but because of who we are.

A Century Turns by William J. Bennet

The latest offering from Thomas Nelson is the book A Century Turns, Ne Hopes, New Fears by William J. Bennett. The book's aim is to chart the events of American political history from 1988 through to 2008. It starts with the election of George Bush Snr and finishes with Barak Obama. As the blurb states;

As America collectively exhaled at the end of the Cold War, we loosened our grip on the fear of nuclear confrontation for the first time since WW2. Some scholars even characterized the collapse of the Soviet Union as the end of history itself. Peace was palpable. But America's domestic and global vitals changed almost instantly, and turbulence, not tranquility, marked the turn of the Century.

Firstly, I have to say I really enjoyed the book. In fact there were sections of it that were so gripping and dramatic that I could hardly put it down! Picking up the book has coincided very well with my recent discovery of the genius that is the West Wing. I do find the American presidential system very interesting. I am intrigued by the way religion and particularly Christianity play a major role in the political scene. I enjoy the sense of patriotism and loyalty people have to the flag and office of president. The book does chart the peaks and troughs of the 20 year period looking at all the presidents and what they did, or did not achieve.

Having said the book did slightly irritate me throughout. I am/was pretty ignorant when it comes to American and world politics of the past 20 years. Obviously, I had heard of the major characters that came up throughout the book but I did not really know the ins and outs of the story lines which meant that I had to take what the book said as true. But Bennett the author worked for all the Republican presidential candidates. He was involved in election campaigns and policy for the party. He was a personal friend of the Bush family. And this comes through as you read the book. Sometimes it makes you wonder if the republicans ever did anything wrong as they are defended vociferously throughout the book and the democrats are regularly attacked. This did take the shine off the book and made me want to read a similar history from the other side.